


Fire Emblem Heroes > housekeeping

by 017Bluefield



Series: Project Bluefield // side-stories [2]
Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: Gen, Humor, Misbehaving Characters, Not Serious, Serious, Slice of Life, Strong Language, Surprises, extra content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-14
Packaged: 2020-08-23 11:49:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20242378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/017Bluefield/pseuds/017Bluefield
Summary: Maintenance work around the world of Askr is a lot more eventful than it sounds. Whether that's agoodthing or not is a completely different matter.- - -The Ashen Wolves stop by Askr regularly for "off-the-record mediations". Things get ataaaddenser and whackier than usual....Includes a not-so-whacky hook that I might not touch.





	Fire Emblem Heroes > housekeeping

**Author's Note:**

> Context for this: the characters Dreyza, Trey and Bluefield (mentioned) are three of the five members of the "Ashen Wolves". Bluefield is the advisor, Dreyza the squad leader, and Trey the "point man". Kronya really hates them, though she's not sure why that is… Not that she cares.
> 
> \- - -
> 
> _**Content Warning**: Strong Language_

#### "New Regular Irritant"

#### Dreyza

* * *

"Kiran! Kiran! SomeOne! Anybody, help!"

"Stop _running,_ worm, and let me _stab you!_"

_"Gah!"_

Kiran and I turned to the source of that commotion—somewhere in the hallway outside. _Oh, boy,_ I thought.

One second later, Trey rushed through the doorway and beelined for me. "Dreyza! Kiran! She's here!" he exclaimed as he hid behind me.

"Who?" Kiran blinked, bewildered.

"Who else?" I muttered, putting one hand on Trey's trembling grip on me.

"Th-The pale lady!"

As fast as thought, _she_ appeared in the doorway, looking quite irritated. "There you are!" she snarled.

Kronya. An assassin from some long-forgotten underground cult. Childish. Gleefully sadistic. Arrogant as hell. And unfortunate enough to be summoned here as a Hero—thus bound to a contract that ensures she can't kill anyOne in Askr.

So naturally, that restriction doesn't apply to Zeros. Zeros like Trey and I.

I groaned. Sometimes, I understood why Bluefield hated this "job".

"Now sit still, boy, so I can kill you already!" Kronya was definitely _not_ very happy. Chase probably went longer than she'd intended?

"Kronya, stop attacking the—"

But she was already striding toward him, dagger out at the ready.

"Back up," I said. Trey immediately let go of me.

No further thought. No planning. I walked forward and grabbed her knife-bearing wrist with my right, pulled outward hard, and swung down with my left.

_SNAP._

I heard a scream. It was Kronya's.

Disarmed and off-balance, the assassin crashed to the carpet, grasping at her dislocated elbow as she rolled. Her "three coattails" flailed, as useless as the dagger at my feet.

"Gah, damn you!" she shrieked. "Damn you!"

I didn't respond right away. Managing another breath, I growled, "Says the witch who started it."

Walking over and scooping her dagger into my teeth, I shoved her onto her front, pinned her left hand under my left knee, and her legs under my right knee. Then I grabbed her right arm in both hands and, with some difficulty, relocated her arm. The assassin yelped. Then I pinned her _right_ hand under my left knee, too.

I pulled the dagger out of my mouth, spitting. "You're not slithering out of this, _fuckhead._"

Trey exhaled in relief. Kiran stepped forward, exasperated. "Kronya, we talked about this before: stop trying to kill them."

She started to squirm under me. "Agh, why _not?!_ They're not Heroes _or_ Askrans!" She said Askrans the way you'd say _rat carcasses_ or _rotten vegetables_. "Why _shouldn't_ I slaughter them?"

I looked over at Trey. He was breathing in measured intervals—calming himself down now that the danger was over.

[ CORRUPTED DATA ] to show her?" he asked.

I looked from Trey to Kiran, then back. Then I looked at the dagger in my hand. Getting her off our backs was a tempting prospect, but...

"No," I decided. "The Order's in no position to pick and choose their Heroes. Besides, she's not the 'sport' we came for." Well, not yet.

"Sport?!" Kronya started squirming again. "You little bitch! I'll show you what my sport is!"

Kiran sighed. "Right, well... I'm going to find Legault and Barst and a few others, have them take her off your hands."

"Thanks." I looked at Trey. "Go with Kiran. Don't worry; this One's not gonna get anywhere."

Trey nodded. "Sorry..."

Before I could say anything, he and the Summoner had walked out of the room.

I looked back down at Kronya. "You ever try this again," I said in a low, calm voice, "and I can't guarantee that Bluefield will make your next defeat as quick as the first."

The slither-bitch stopped.

I inhaled. "That's more like it."

* * *

#### Bonus

* * *

"Twis-_sit_-ted... Tiwi-_see_-tid.. Tws—_Bleagh!_" Blu groaned. "OK no, nope, I can't say it out-loud. That's a _fuck_-awful acronym, by the way."

I sighed. "Like they said, it's not supposed to be a proper noun, like 'Zeros' or 'Shell Armed Forces'."

My brother made a face. "So...a bunch of arrogant cultists...hiding under the _mouthful_ that is a purposefully-non-proper label." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Oof, that's a... That sounds like a serious headache."

"And...our predecessors had to deal with them, too."

"Yeah. Long before Chisari was around, actually."

"Before Chisari, so that's...over five centuries ago. Maybe further back?"

His face darkened. "It's...certainly possible."

I grimaced. Bluefield wasn't always keen on talking about Zero history, mostly because he only knew a small amount of it. "...Blu, do you think we can check the archives? See what they put down on record?"

"Assuming we don't have any restrictions still on us? Yeah, we can."

"Then we'd better meet with Vaire. We'll need as much info as we can before they attack again."

"Lead the way."


End file.
